Sometimes I experience the sensation of expansiveness. It happens most often just as I am waking up or drifting off. The best thing about this sensation is its optimism. This sensation tells me everything is as it should be. It's all good.
I can describe it is as a pot boiling over. I'm the pot and my spirit is the liquid inside the pot that expands until it can't be contained and starts to run over the edge. When your kitchen pots are boiling over it's a sign that you're doing something wrong. When your spirit wants to expand beyond the container of your body, it's a sign you are doing everything right. Just let it go.
I'm not sure if the sense of expansiveness is just my spirit letting loose with its bad self, or whether it is my portion of spirit joining with the mother spirit. Whenever it happens I get a glimpse of the person I can be, that I truly am, without the shackles of my ego, fears, values and social mores. The real me is playful, fearless, loving and curious. The real me really loves you. Even if you are being a bit of an asshole, I love you. The real me can see the real you inside of there. The real me knows the real you is being contained in this moment by all of your ego, fears, values and social mores. The real me wants to hug you or wink at you or tease you or give you whatever you need right now to let you know that everything is as it should be. You are all good. The real me trusts that when the situation is reversed, you will also love me. Imagine if the real me and the real you busted out at the same time? How great would that be?
The real me would like to invite the real you out to play.
Chicken out
The real me accepts.
ReplyDelete(I have this feeling as well, by the way, just before falling asleep. Isn't it wonderful???)
On another note, I keep trying to add you to my blog list. It hasn't worked so far, but I wonder if it's because I keep trying at work? Will try at home once I have a moment. :-)
Pearl
We are going to have a good time, Pearl. And I'm so glad that someone identifies with what I've tried to explain. I don't know what is going on with my blog. Something is very very wrong. My whole blog roll disappeared earlier this week. The gadget and everything. I think that I am probably going to try another platform. Thank you for trying, though.
DeleteSounds very nice.
ReplyDeleteSome time ago I thought I'd try to get in touch with my 'manly' self. It took a week, but somebody told me he was at a sportsbar in Palo Alto. I called, the bartender put him on. We had a nice conversation, I heard a throaty woman's laugh in the background. He finally said "Hey, listen, it's been great talking, but I'm kinda busy right now. We'll get together soon, I promise."
I'm not holding my breath.
Oh, and Pearl? I don't want to read any more about how 'busy' you are at work.......
SFM...let him go. You don't need him. Get in touch with your feminine side instead. She's much more fun and she won't hog the remote or drink all your beer.
DeleteThis is wonderful. I must find the real me, eh?
ReplyDeleteHilary, you are one of the people that I think has found the real you and is showing the rest of us the way with your camera.
DeleteThat sounds like joy, if you ask me. I mostly feel that when I've had enough sleep. Lack of sleep kills it dead.
ReplyDeleteMust get more sleep. Then make playdate with Chicken.
Yes, Joy, and sometimes just unlimited possibility. Don't forget! Call me when you wakee up:)
DeleteI have those sorts of feelings mostly associated with music, both the playing of it and the listening to it. It's a feeling of being part of something larger than one's self and it feels... *right*. Richard Thompson said that music is spiritual stuff, and that may be what he was talking about.
ReplyDelete-Doug in Oakland
Weird-I just read an article about that recently. I can't remember where I saw it. I agree, though.
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