Friday, December 6, 2013

Santa Maybe....

Santa maybe, get BigB to trim the tree
for me
Maybe even hang some lights, Santa Baby
Could you call him sometime maybe tonight?

Santa Maybe, could we talk about the little one too
It's true
He's bouncing off the walls around  here, Santa Maybe
Could we dose him with the whiskey this once?

Think of all the dishes I've rinsed
Think of all the Bravo television  I've missed
Next year I might be just as good
If you'll send me a personal chef
Santa really, there's one thing that you maybe could do
Could you
Send me thirteen elves on loan?  I will
Send them back to you next year

Santa Maybe, send Martha Stewart to my house
To bake
200 sugar cookies, no wait, that's scary
Just send them down the chimney instead

Santa would you, wrap these presents for me
and then
Send them next day fed ex for free I will
Forever be your biggest fan

You could even clean my garage if you like
Maybe hold a garage sale while I read this book
I really do believe in you
I know you can get rid of all this junk

Santa Maybe, just one more little thing
The ring
The one around my bathtub is gross could you
Send Magic Mike to clean it tonight

I know this isn't Magic Mike but "Matthew McConaughey dressed as a cowboy stripper"
didn't really flow well


  1. Okay, all this post needs is a video of you singing it. After several tumblers of wine. Do we have to beg?

  2. Funny you should mention it, I was hoping I could entice someone else into doing that for me. Maybe Pearl? She seems out going:-) How about you? I'll bet you have a lovely voice.

  3. If you write it, you need to sing it!! It's a rule!! Okay it's a rule I just made up, but it should be a real rule!!

    And thanks anyway but I sound like Miss Piggy - on one of her extra bad days :)

    1. Ha ha. I just write him, I don't sing 'em. I sound like Kermit with laryngitis. But I want to hear it, too. Let's see. Think! Who do we know who's Eartha Marily Madonnaish who can sing?

  4. Very clever and cut. It does get hectic at this time of year.

    1. AC, yes it sure does. I don't know how Santa does it but I want some of what his magic!

  5. Let me get this straight,
    Instead of Ho, Ho, Ho
    you are wanting to hear
    Oh right, oh right, oh right

  6. And now I've got THAT in my head. And it's AWESOME.

    I love every moment of this. You weirdo. :-)


  7. Replies
    1. Wait...why aren't WE friends on facebook. Lets be friends. Thanks so much

  8. What a hoot. And I agree with Jenny.. you must post a video of you singing it. Or Pearl. Or you and Pearl. Yeah. Perhaps next year, maybe. ;)

  9. Brilliant!!! Hilarious and brilliant.

  10. Best laugh I had all month! Added you to my blogroll.

  11. Now that's the Christmas spirit!! LOL! You're a clever one, Ms. CC. I'll be thinking of you every time I hear that song now. Merry Christmas, my friend. :)

  12. I don't want to admit this but I was singing it from the first delightful line to the last. Merry Christmas!

    1. Geo, I picture you singing all the time. Singing and creating and laughing. That's the way I see you. Thank you.

  13. Seriously, you have the best lines: "...dose him with the whiskey this once." Yea, I like you.

  14. Hi Jocelyn, thank you. I like you, too. And whiskey. For the record, I've never dosed anyone underage. yet.


Say something. You know you want to.