In my next life, I hope to return as a silver tongued devil. It seems to me that these types usually make out okay regardless of mean circumstances and humble beginnings. Good looks will only take you so far, and eventually they'll fail you, but a silver tongued devil is usually silver tongued all his life. You'll probably have noticed there aren't many dumb silver tongued devils out there. The mouth and tongue are only the front of the house-the real work is going on behind that, where all the wheels are churning out 427 persuasive words per minute.
I'll let my lean, lightening fast tongue lead the way, helping folks less fortunate understand where they went wrong with their thinking and how I can help.
I'll start my own You Tube channel.
I'll run for public office.
I'll rap.
I'll give a Ted Talk.
I'll talk my toddlers into the bathtub and bed as needed, with nary a complaint or tear.
I'll convince my teens that doing housework makes them 60% more attractive.
I'll convince my husband that meal preparation is super sexy.
Then I'll go take a nap. It's tiring being a silver tongued devil.
What will you be in your next life?
Chicken out
Silver-tongued devil, eh? Sounds like a plan. Don't forget to get in on the Ponzi/pyramid schemes.
ReplyDeleteIn my next life, I want to be a cat. Owned by me.
Wait, there's something wrong with that plan.
Hi Jenny-well, Ponzi schemes are good for a while but eventually they catch up with you, silver tongue or no. Hmmm. Maybe I want to be your cat owned by you, too. I could be your sister cat.
ReplyDeleteWe could have an excellent life! If you like being indoors 24/7, that is. I don't like doing that, but the alternative is traffic, coyotes, or birds of prey ... shudder. Management should build us an outdoor enclosure, I think.
Delete"Management should build us an outdoor enclousre"...When you combine that suggestion with the term "sister cat", it starts to sound a little nefarious not to mention creepy. Or is it just me? Maybe I'm still thinking too much like a human
DeleteI tend to be on the naïve side, so I'm not sure what you're thinking ... I was just referring to myself as management, and what I "should" do to improve my cats' lives. Is that creepy? Or just irrelevant? I'm rapidly developing cabin fever, so please excuse any off-topic comments!
DeleteNah, it's me being weird. You said outdoor enclosure and it reminded me of the stories lately about people being kidnapped and confined in peoples' houses as sex slaves for decades before being found
DeleteEeeeeeek!!! Now I can see why you thought what you thought.
DeleteNo, I was being literal about the cats. Right now they are all feeling deprived of human contact (I can't bend over to play with them and I can't lift them, because of my eye).
Aw, poor kitties. Hope you are feeling better.
ReplyDelete